I have my own name as a silverback gorilla. I once was respected by my specie, once lived in the wild, once had my own choice of life.
I was given a human name, Kijito. I lost my dignity, I am caged in glass walls, and am used as entertaining tools for human kids.
I hate them. My life won’t go anywhere farther than this small cage. I could not do anything other than walking around all day and sleeping, I am slowly losingmy patience and emotions, as the kids giggled shouted and hit the glass wall, as people shot videos of me and added fun and relaxing background music, as if I was happy, or I meant to entertain them.
I was not.
What I only heard, all day long, was people buzzing, the glass wall vibrating, and kids excitingly telling their parents, “Look! He’s walking towards us!” “He’speeing! Ewww!” “He’s playing with that trunk!” and their parents shouting back,“HAHA! Interesting!” “Take a picture!” And “He’s having so much FUN!”
They just won’t go away. They piss me off, but I can’t defend. That glass wall. I just can’t do anything to them, anything for me. I tried so many times to warn them, or make them go away, but the wall is in the way. I cannot fight formyself. It is all useless. All I got was painful punishment from zoo people. It’s hopeless. I sunk deeper and deeper, into desperation and anxiety. And fear,those humans seemed like monsters, their voices are so evil, and every timethey hit the glass wall, it causes an earthquake inside me. Even when I sleep, I can hear them. They conquered my life.
I’ve lost my hope to live. I don’t care. Anger took over me and I hit the glass wallinto the crowd with the strength of my life. The glass didn’t move. I bounced back from it.
Fear, anger and anxiety swallowed me. My mind collapsed. I fell on the ground and couldn’t do anything.
Whatdid I hear? Why is the crowd cheering? The noise they make surrounded me again. They were shouting“Cool!”“Nice” “Again!” But I couldn’t hear it. I amemotionless now.
What were they cheering for?